Autism – what really gets me down
If I had to describe what it is about autism that really gets on my pip, it would be the tiresomeness of it all. By this, I don't mean how tiring autism is, [translation = the lie down and sleep kind of tiredness] but more the real tiresomeness of it all. [translation = annoyingness of it all]
It would be alright, I suppose, if what is true today, would also be true tomorrow, or yesterday, or the next 12 hours, or twelve minutes, for that matter, but it's not, is it? [translation = rhetorical question]
What is true and accurate this second, may not be so in the next second. [translation = the second second] For example, quite often you can get away with lots of casual every day statements, comments, questions and other bits and pieces that make up an ordinary sort of conversation, without anyone taking issue with you. Then all of a sudden, just as you've been lulled into a false sense of security, you utter a few more words and all hell breaks loose for no apparent reason. It was o.k. for you to say what you said, two sentences ago, but now, someone has switched on their radar and you're under attack from all sides for the most innocent of comments.
An example always helps in these instances. [translation = I hope] So you're nipping along in your winkie dinkie little European car, with a truckload of passengers, on the wrong side of the road because you're in England on holiday. You chat to the other adults in the car, as all people under the age of ten, are asleep. Because they are asleep, by definition, they are not listening. All radars are in the off position.
“It should be the next left I think?”
“Do you think?”
“I think so.”
“What do you think?”
“I can't remember if it's the next left or the left after the next, but thinking about it, I think you’re right?”
This is four adult people in conversation about a tentative destination, where you cannot see the surrounding countryside because is it blinkered from view by ten foot hedgerows. As we dither, collectively, a small person is suddenly awake, with a complaint, a verbal one, “no more dah fink. Dat is stoopid. Shut up wiv dah fink. Dah fink is being silent in dah brain, not in dah mowf.” This dislodges another from slumberland, “yeah, what he said, er says, um said.” The last one wriggles with restlessness, “yeah, me too, all this thinking is far too noisy!”
It would see that they’re not the only ones with volume control issues!
August 11th, 2007 at 11:35 pm
Possible that we all do think too much—or maybe not enough about what we need to (being so tired).
August 12th, 2007 at 1:40 am
Thinking aloud? Cheers.
August 12th, 2007 at 7:03 am
But, goodness, it is all so very tiring.
August 12th, 2007 at 10:13 am
It does sound tiring. And the worst of it is, with the more cseverly autistic, one does not really know how much improvement can be expected.
I was at an Asperger adult support group yesterday, where attendees ranged from 20-60 years in age. I certainly saw myself in the more impaired younger people, and that gave me confidence that they can one day end up as successful at life as me.
But the more severly autistic, you just don’t know, because it’s not possible to know if the issues within the brain are the same. Listening to the people yesterday, it was evident that we share a common condition. But do we share a condition with a kid who suffered a prenatal or birth injury, or chemical poisioning?
So it’s very hard to know what parents of such kids can expect and while I think examples like me provide hope, it’s still undoubetdly very wearing.
August 12th, 2007 at 7:17 pm
It IS tiring, I’m so with you on that one.
August 12th, 2007 at 7:31 pm
heheh thinking does get too noisy at times!
August 12th, 2007 at 7:35 pm
I do love your stories!
And, just in the time I’ve been dropping by, the boys sound like they’ve made huge strides.
August 13th, 2007 at 7:04 am
For me it’s anxiety…if I could just get rid of my own anxiety about every little thing…
August 13th, 2007 at 9:40 am
Yeah… we watched a movie a few weeks ago and Little Bug giggled and danced and loved it. Put it in again the other day and he threw himself on the floor and filled the neighborhood (I’m sure they could all hear him) with blood curdling screams. I am waiting for Child Protective Services to show up on my doorstep…
August 13th, 2007 at 12:51 pm
What wonderful expression, though! I love it!
August 14th, 2007 at 6:57 pm
Maddy, I’m too tired to even comment!
LOVE the photo at the end!