A routine hic-cup
They have been in bed for barely ten minutes when I hear a soft tapping on the front door because I have better hearing than a bat, as is so often the case when a person has a weakness, other senses compensate. I fly to the door and welcome him in, “Hi, come on through.” The visitor's soft footfalls alert the herd on high. They bound down the stairs to meet and greet, because anything is better than going to bed. Perchance to dream and rats to sleep.
Spouse's visitor has arrived to discuss very important matters. The menfolk require solitude and silence to accomplish their goal. Their goal does not accommodate three minors who should be fast asleep already. They hang on the staircase dithering between two opposing forces, the Mother of all Titans and an unknown stranger. I lose of course. “What you are?”
“Hi I'm Hans.” He knows about our children.
“You are work?”
“No I'm a friend of yur Dad's.” He's a natural.
“You are night?”
“Yes, I think you guys are supposed to be in bed huh?” For a non-parent I am well impressed.
“We are say hello.”
“Hello.” Perfect!
“Come along you lot, say goodnight, not hello.” I am so cross that they're all out of bed and we'll have to repeat the whole 'good night' routine to get back into the well worn groove. The bed time routine encompasses specific words in precise order for two of them. It is time consuming and ritualized. Any deviation from form requires repetition, back to square one. Nothing less than perfection is acceptable.
There again, I am so happy that all of my children are interested in a visitor. It reflects the change in my multiple choice life of a few years ago. Then I had two choices, the stranger would be unnoticed, the stranger would be noticed and categorized as a 'thing of terror.' That was a considerable improvement on previous years, when only the second category existed. When the 'thing of terror' arrived I transformed myself into a Koala bear, where two cubs clung to me frozen with fear. The fear has gone because all children develop and grow.
“Why Hans he is here?” I debate. I decide that truth in advertising would be a good policy? I shall appeal to their innate sense of fairness which is deep seated and firmly entrenched.
“Hans is here for a play date with Daddy.”
“A play date?”
“Yes.”
“Where he be play?”
“In the garage.”
“In dah garage?”
“Yes.”
“We can be play in dah garage too?”
“Well sometimes it's hard to share a play date, isn't it?” They look from one to another and internal calculation of pros and cons, privacy and sharing or so I surmise because I am an expert. I know their internal workings and can anticipate all possibilities, instantaneously.
“Dis is yur first play date Daddy?” The men folk exchange cautious glances, wide eyed, “well….er…..yes!”
The children’s bodies are already turned around in the process of scrabbling back up the stairs, as their spokesperson bellows, “play nice guys.”
I suspect that my own “social skills” could do with a brush up, over “here.”
October 27th, 2007 at 10:31 pm
Another strike against the myth of the person alone!
Hope Spouse and Friend had “fun.”
October 28th, 2007 at 2:17 am
I think you handled it really well!
October 28th, 2007 at 2:45 am
I love the ‘play nice guys’. That cracked me up!
October 28th, 2007 at 6:08 am
Gorgeous line-”The visitor’s soft footfalls alert the herd on high.”
Your kids are really cute and they look like fun.
Love,
Suzy
October 28th, 2007 at 8:19 am
Your children are indeed growing up. Kids are so inquisitive, even those with extreme difficulties. They just know how to hide it well.
Crystal xx
October 28th, 2007 at 8:48 am
Leah used to run in terror from men wearing hats. She would be all right once the hats came off most of the time as long as the hat was hidden.
One fellow scared her hat or not. He had a gruff personality, but was always kind to her.
October 28th, 2007 at 9:10 am
I love people who instinctively get it. Which isn’t really fair is it? So cute. I hope they had a good “playdate”.
October 28th, 2007 at 1:44 pm
while its very nice to see their growth I can absolutly understand the annoyance of having to start the routine over however…
October 28th, 2007 at 2:16 pm
Quick thinking! I’m not sure that I would have thought of the “playdate”! Very clever
October 28th, 2007 at 2:30 pm
This was magnificent! And, um, did they then require the entire routine again before going to bed? Or was the understanding “stranger” an acceptable diversion?
Hope They guys enjoyed their “playdate!” (ROFL at *that* one!)
xo
October 28th, 2007 at 5:38 pm
You really do think on your feet, eh? Playdate for big guys, hmmmm. Not bad at all. Hans sounds really intuitive.
October 28th, 2007 at 6:18 pm
I wish my little ones could understand the concept of grownup playdates! It’s SO hard to get them to stay upstairs, let alone in bed, when we have grownup visitor after their bedtime!
BTW, thanks for quoting the words your kids use. I’m an English as a Second Language teacher, currently working with a kindergartner who is on the autism spectrum. The home language is Russian. It was really interesting for me to read what your kids said and realize that my little one at school is making similar errors in his English! Of course, it doesn’t really matter to me what the root of his language issues are, just whether I can help him with them. Fortunately he really loves to talk and has a big vocabulary, but just doesn’t string it all together very well yet.
I know every kid is different, but I’ll be a regular visitor here in the hopes that it may give me insights that will help my teaching (or even dealing with my own kids at home!), and because I’m also a middle-aged, bifocaled, ex-pat from the UK!
October 28th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
They don’t want to miss anything.
It is great how you are able to know which words to pick
Bed time just isn’t easy is it
October 29th, 2007 at 11:05 am
Love how adults can have playdates too!!
November 17th, 2007 at 4:16 pm
I know I say this all the time, but I love how well you capture some of the same things that go on in my life: like the strangers who are either ignored or things of terror — and the sleep routine that is lengthy, detailed and must be done to perfection! Makes me smile in recognition every time.