The day of Rest - Imagine it’s Sunday
When I was a young and youthful person, I was an efficient decision maker.
I would analyse the relevant facts in a logical manner and make an executive decision.
On the whole it was usually the right decision.
Any errors that I made, didn’t generally have dire consequences.
I am given to understand that it is a very common problem.
Which problem?
The inability to choose. Whilst it may be a problem for the person trying to make a choice, it is a far more annoying problem, for the person observing the person who is unable to choose. Self, self, self. Theories abound as to why this should be so, and I’m always open to additional theories. Subtle hint! Many people are unaware of how many choices they make, but it only takes a few moments thought to have some inkling of how frequently this occurs. Some clever people might make allusions to ‘executive function,’ but that far too high brow for me. I prefer more simple examples that are easier to grasp.
For instance, when you awaken in your bed, hopefully in the morning, although not too early, you open your eyes. Already you have made two choices, the first being to wake up, the second being to open your eyes. Now you have to decide if, or when, to leave your bed, and you’ve only been awake less than a nano second? Are you going to be happy or sad? Have you managed to remember or blot out, a reason that might influence either decision? Already you have made a whole slew of decisions and the day has hardly begun.
Whilst this is the curse that my eldest son endures, I wonder how closely we might really be related?
I have already run through all my early morning decisions and hover, on the cusp of the next one. I dither between my choice of available reading matter, which book should I choose? The one to induce brain expansion, or escapism, or humour or the new whodunnit? Too difficult to choose. I move on to paperwork? Which of these tedious chores should I tackle first? Update lists, write shopping list, tackle medical insurance claims, compose letter to school? Too difficult to decide. I debate which household task to manhandle first: sanitize toilet, take out the recycling, cook breakfast or start the laundry? Too tricky to trump. I stand in the middle of the kitchen in a daze awaiting enlightenment.
A thunder of tiny hooves crashes from on high, as all my children descend at 5:30 in the morning.
“I am……..my tummy is…….where….?”
“It is dah Sunday day?”
“Come on Mom, where’s the pancakes, we’re starving?”
That solves that one then. At least I can rely on at least three people to kick my own executive function into gear.
Stumble it!
November 15th, 2007 at 1:35 am
Oh, to be back in the days where I could make decisions without having little bodies make them for me! At least there’s no chance of procrastination when they’re involved!!!
xx
November 15th, 2007 at 2:15 am
5.30am and you were thinking about cleaning the toilet?
I just don’t know what to say!
November 15th, 2007 at 4:35 am
5:30am I’m thinking about coffee
decisions hopefully come later.
November 15th, 2007 at 4:48 am
You have a handsome devil of your own. What a gorgeous shot. I can so relate to the thought process you were describing. It is 2:30am, your 10 year old is lightly coughing in the next room. Do you go to him or wait and hope he will manage it on his own? He isn’t awake but he did cough several times and now you are awake too and lying there thinking about lots of things. May as well get up and give him something for the cough. Lay back down and try to sleep. The coughing stopped and the child is still sleeping so that should be a good thing but now the adult is fully awake. Should she continue tossing about the bed or get up and be awake? Both will likely wake the spouse… Anyway, it is 3:44 and I’m awake, typing this to you. One of my best friends and I actually struggle so much with this thought process sometimes that I love the phrase she coined, “paralysis of analysis.” Another book to consider is one called, You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy? And the spouse is now awake… Life is hard, tricky, challenging, beautiful, wonderful and rewarding. Cheers.
November 15th, 2007 at 5:42 am
Connor makes my decisions all the time he just has trouble with his. He knows what he wants if you offer him a choice, he wants both. Right now though his yes is the absence of a screeching “NO!”
November 15th, 2007 at 5:51 am
Executive Function is an imaginary friend in our house who must be on vacation because we can’t seem to reach him.
November 15th, 2007 at 7:17 am
Patrick is very decisive and I am not. Imagine the scenarios. *grin* The biggest problem being when we’re both very decisive but his YES is definately a big NO!
November 15th, 2007 at 7:29 am
I so relate to this, and to the above comment by Mary. The hamster in the cage starts running in my brain in the middle of the night with the coughing and what to do, what will my strategy be if my son is indeed getting sick as far what medicines to give? There is no rest for the weary. My son makes the decisions for me as well-It’s like I had a labotomy in the night; I stare a lot, say to myself, “now what was I doing, what are we doing…” And the day blurs into night.
November 15th, 2007 at 7:34 am
I have that problem with making choices, especially if someone is standing beside me asking me to choose. If I’m by myself it’s better. As an example, I’ll be buying lunch and make a couple of circuits of the food court before I decide.
I might make a post on my own blog about this if I remember to.
November 15th, 2007 at 9:01 am
I like letting other people make decisions before me whenever possible. I make enough decisions on my own… of course, my Husband feels the same way… which is why we rarely go out without kids. We spend all of our time driving around looking at resturants saying “What about that one??” :S
November 15th, 2007 at 9:14 am
You do realize that your decision-making capability doesn’t decrease with age so much as it decreases with offspring, right? Each kid decreases your ability by twenty percent. Woe to those with many children, as they can usually be found in front of a shower, in their pajamas, debating whether to get in or not.
November 15th, 2007 at 9:29 am
You are one the money with your comments about decision making. My biggest issue with the populus as a whole is not necessarily recognizing that choices are available, it’s more recognizing and taking ownership of those choices themselves.
November 15th, 2007 at 9:30 am
and by one the money, I meant on the money… but I apparently made a decision to mispell it… but I am taking responsibility for it and not blaming society for this transgression… for now.
November 15th, 2007 at 9:42 am
it only takes one, really…
November 15th, 2007 at 10:27 am
One of the hardest things that I have to do each day is to make decisions, it is a chore within a chore and it is just too tough sometimes. I am of the philosophy that to not make a decision is still making a decision so no matter how you slice it, it is still a decision (bummer). It is amazing that I am trying to teach Griffin how to make decisions because I am the world’s worst at it, and I do not lead by example. All I can do is to wish that he will listen to what I request of him and to not watch me flip flop with the smallest of decisions and appear utterly confused and silly. Sometimes it is such a daunting task but strangely enough I ultimately make it through the day on my own……I never cease to amaze myself!
Hugs and smiles!
November 15th, 2007 at 11:22 am
Ha, I love and identify with this post. I’ve been known to waffle on things a time or two. I love using expressions like “perhaps” and “maybe” when asked if I will attend. In my case I link it to being part of a large family and riding the fence on so many things.
I love how you describe your reading material dilemma.
November 15th, 2007 at 11:44 am
Ok, flutter’s response was too funny. Maddy we’re all pullin’ for you. When in doubt choose wheat toast over white and wear your underwear inside your clothing.
November 15th, 2007 at 1:56 pm
5:30 am, my boys are finally back to sleep. Now, 6 am is a whole different story…
November 15th, 2007 at 3:12 pm
This post really moved me because it speaks to us all. The best writing is that which has universality.
November 15th, 2007 at 4:57 pm
I am not good at getting up early anymore. I don’t know how you get up so early! I guess I used to. Funny how things change when you don’t have to be anywhere in the morning! And did you make pancakes?! Can I move in with you? Yum!
November 15th, 2007 at 5:43 pm
Oh God, just reading all the decisions you felt you had to make depressed me. And I had to turn over and go back to sleep.
November 15th, 2007 at 5:46 pm
Sometimes just the realisation that I have made a choice to sit here reading this rather than attend other pressing matter is enough to spark me back into action. Is that my executive function? or just a mother’s guilt?
November 15th, 2007 at 6:06 pm
I’ve let the boys in my house determine my decisions for so long now that I’m not sure how I’ll decide ANYTHING when their needs aren’t so immediate!
November 15th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
You are living in my head! Honestly, this could be on my blog.
I still maintain that the atypical-ness of my boys is contagious, and I am completely infected.
November 15th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
Meant to say I love the photo! Handsome.
November 15th, 2007 at 6:40 pm
This make me really think about the decisions I make over the course of a day, and how many of them are entirely mine!
November 15th, 2007 at 6:45 pm
This MAKES me think…sorry!
And what I meant was that your post makes me think/wonder about how many decisions really are mine–and how there aren’t many that are.
November 15th, 2007 at 11:04 pm
If you’re up before 5:30, I would hope you’re in bed by 8:30 p.m. I’d wager that’s not the case. Perhaps you’d be a better decision maker with a few more hours of chosen sleep under your belt?
Ha! I know you do just fine…’tho it does help to have kids who constantly let us know what we should be doing–usually in their service.
November 16th, 2007 at 6:25 am
I think you can always rely on kids to get you started in the morning. I used to have this theory that if Amy goes to bed later, she will lie in. Whoever told me that load of rubbish is what my daughter would call “a fibber”!
Crystal xx