Chicken philosophy and word retrieval
“What it is?” asks my youngest son. I raise my eyes from his homework sheet and try not to glower.
When will either of them ever learn to reference back, give me some tiny clue about the question? I have a choice. I can prompt him or I can wait. If I wait long enough, he will repeat the question, the same words but louder to aid my comprehension.
One day, just maybe, he will ask me a question in context, a whole question with all the clues built in and I shall fall down dead from shock. I feel an attack of grumpiness pricking the corners of my mouth. I suppress a sigh and thank my lucky stars that he chooses to talk at all.
“What is what dear?”
“An egg?”
“Hmm, well Grandpa would say that an egg is hen fruit.” I wonder if my Dad can remember his witticism, the kind designed for children's entertainment, or is that lost to Alzheimers too?
“Hen fruit? Hen fruit! HEN FRUIT! Ahh tis a joke I am finking.”
“You're right! It is a joke, a family joke, probably not a very funny one though.”
“What else?”
“What else is an egg, apart from a joke?”
“Yes.”
“It's something that you can eat, very tasty and it can be a chicken baby or rather a chick.”
“Er……hens eat dah chicks?”
“No, people do.”
“People eat chicken babies? Gross man!” splutters the neophobe who currently only eats 13 foods.
“Er well…”
“Why they are?”
“Why are they what dear?”
“Why are dey dah sometimes white and dah sometimes brown?”
“It depends upon what the chicken eats. The food that the chicken eats can change the colour of the shell.” I decide to avoid the issue of different breeds as I'm already out of my depth, my fowl facts having been hand plucked from watching Chicken Run some three years prior.
“We can have pink eggs?”
“Hmm at Easter you can dye them any colour you like.”
“Why they are dead?” Oh no! A trigger word. Meltdown imminent. Dive for cover!
“Dead?”
“You say they are 'died.'”
“Oh not dead died but dyed 'coloured,' like when you dye your paper different colours with your markers.”
“Vvv vvvv vvvvvv?”
“Vegetable?” Animal, vegetable or mineral? What now? What is he on about?
“I beed a vegetable?”
“Are you?”
“No.”
“?”
“Vegetables don be eat chicken's………..?”
“Oh right! You mean vegetarians don't eat meat, or chickens for that matter.” I suppose he is a vegetarian now I come to think of it. Every one of his 13 foods would fall into that category. Sounds so much better than Neophobe anyway. So much easier to explain. My seven year old is an ardent vegetarian. I like it! Yes, we should certainly encourage this language expansion.
“No.”
“No?”
“I am a Vegan.”
“A Vegan?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“I don eat eggs.”
More shock! Grumpiness dispelled.
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:54 am
Leaps and bounds with the new words there! And you are right, it does sound much better than neophobe.
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:20 am
Love the chicken philosophy!
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:31 am
A vegan! That explains the aversion to shoes (leather) and the clothes (um, fibre). It’s all making sense!
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:56 am
hehe. I love the way your son thinks!
January 22nd, 2008 at 5:40 am
great conversation. we shall swap labels of our children. you can use vegan i shall call my vegetarian child a neophobe….she declared herself a vegetarian a year ago and has become increasingly particular. it’s irritating to watch this kid who used to eat anything become so particular.
January 22nd, 2008 at 5:51 am
Such wonderful words. Sorry such a short comment, I’m quite ill and just barely hanging on for the time being.
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:49 am
At best I only eat 13 foods. Does rice and spaghetti count as two different foods?
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:51 am
Your son sounds very wise.
I like the idea od eggs being “chicken fruite”.
That is really neat! (No one in my house eats eggs. YUCK!)
January 22nd, 2008 at 7:48 am
Eggs as chicken fruit…hahaha, that is brilliant
January 22nd, 2008 at 8:38 am
I owned chickens and still question eggs. hehehehe Although I do find them really tasty.
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:31 am
Wow! Pointed out the joke and declared himself a vegan. Leaps and bounds I would say.
January 22nd, 2008 at 10:12 am
i love it when they make me giggle
January 22nd, 2008 at 10:29 am
You know, honestly, this sounds like a conversation I would have with the little clowns… although Buddy would ask all the questions and Sweet Pea would provide authoritative answers, right or wrong.
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:01 am
Hmm, is there any real cheese in goldfish? I would hate to burst is bubble. Or does he not eat goldfish?
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:19 am
Amazing.
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:42 pm
Comprehension…..oh, my…do we still struggle with that here.
I love these conversations. Classics.
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:47 pm
…and the student becomes the master.
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:31 pm
I agree with Marla. This one is a classic. Your guy is so clever.
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:34 pm
You have a beautiful style. May I ask a question, however: which came first, the question or the egg?
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:31 pm
but what about the goldfish?
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:59 pm
Amazing conversations. They are better than the ones I have with adults.
Love you.
Suzy
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:15 pm
Following the train of thought is mind boggling. And fabulous that you can re-tell it!
January 22nd, 2008 at 7:25 pm
Chicken fruit? Perfect.
January 22nd, 2008 at 7:51 pm
I love your conversations. And I was wondering myself before I got to the end if those 13 foods qualified him to be a vegan, not just a vegetarian.
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:55 pm
What a terrific exchange. He is so clever! And I love that photo of him.
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:51 am
I think your kids are incredible, we should all have that much insight! BG x
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:11 am
that is a wonderful conclusion! I am vegan. Perfect!
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Wow! I don’t think I knew what a vegan was until I was an adult. Clever little guy.
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Wow! I don’t think I knew what a vegan was until I was an adult. Clever little guy.
January 24th, 2008 at 5:09 am
Just found your blog and it rocks
Great headway your son made there !!
January 28th, 2008 at 9:10 am
Vegan… nice. On the GFCF diet, it would be much easier to be a Vegan… but seeing that I like milk chocolate and haven’t seen soy based milk chocolate, it’s my cheat for the Casein. And there’s that little thing that I LOVE Chicken wings… that kinda gets in the way of the whole “vegetarian” diet. Of course, if I could live on beer alone, that by default would make me Vegan. So I am vegan at heart. Cheers!