Four Seasons
“Hey mum, I found this empty CD case for Vivaldi. I can’t get the tune out of my head. Do you know where the CD is?”
I turn my peeved faced upon my eldest daughter. They’re all the same, completely useless. Whatever it is could be pinned to the end of their noses and they still wouldn’t see a thing.
‘Thing’ blindness.
I’m sure it’s genetic.
“Yes it’s in the office, right hand side on top of the drawers, somewhere in the stack of some 100 or more CD’s. None of them are in their cases.”
“?”
“They’ve all been digitized by your Dad.”
“?”
“It should be ‘digitalized’ don’t you think rather than digitized? Wouldn’t like to be fingered.”
“?”
“The word root! Digit. Finger! Never mind. Anyway don’t ask me anything else about digitization as that’s well out of my league.”
“I don’t think I asked you anything about digitization.”
***
“But I’ve already looked! I can’t find it anywhere!”
“Actually I do remember seeing that somewhere…….somewhere odd…….I thought at the time, ‘I wonder what that’s doing there?’ but I had armfuls of laundry at the time.”
“Well …..where were you when you saw it?”
“Funny, I was just about to ask the same thing of you!”
***
“Where it is?”
“Where is what dear?”
“Er…..my…..egg.”
“Which egg?”
“Er…..dah special white egg wiv dah green spots.”
“Ah, it’s on the side there, but don’t touch it as the glue hasn’t dried yet.”
“Dah glue is still wetted!”
“I know, outrageous isn’t it. Remember, 24 hours to dry.”
“How many?”
“How many eggs or how many spots dear?”
“How many seconds in 24 hours?”
***
“Where?”
“Where what? I mean…..what are you looking for dear?”
“Um…..I am lost……er…..I am losted my thing?”
“Which thing?”
“Dah thing which is being my favourite.”
“Which particular favourite?”
“It is small and red and is buttons and chain and it is being new with my allowance.”
“?”
“Bakugan! Thanks mom.”
“My pleasure, I’m sure.”
Clones indeed!
Today I am also over “here” at “Trusera” with “Charity begins at Home.”
Stumble it!
April 20th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
Don’t know if it is easier or better—Charlie just says “Mom, I want.”
And I go looking.
April 21st, 2008 at 1:15 am
OPEN YOU EYES! Is my most used saying in my household.
April 21st, 2008 at 1:16 am
YOUR even lol. I really don’t speak like that.
April 21st, 2008 at 1:41 am
What is it about any house with a mother in it that causes everyone else to go blind? And they know! They are prepared to pretend for hours that they are looking for a thing, knowing full well that it will never be found until the mother stands, lifts a cushion and produces.
April 21st, 2008 at 5:03 am
Is it a man thing?
CJ xx
April 21st, 2008 at 5:11 am
Joey refuses to look for anything. The therapists chatter on about visual field something and perceptual issues. I think he’s just a boy. Boys don’t look when they can ask mom to produce…
April 21st, 2008 at 5:37 am
It always amuses me that kids think moms should just *know* where their lost things are…I don’t know where my keys are most of the time! LOL
April 21st, 2008 at 5:48 am
Oh, Angela - the disturbing part is that I almost always *do* know where it is. Not that I’ve moved it, mind you, but that somehow a huge portion of my previously excellent brain is now spent visually categorizing the location of every object in the house. I work in vain to force them to look for their own belongings, knowing full well that they won’t find them (even, often, with a verbal guide to where it was last seen). I have taught them to mentally work backwards from where they last remember having it. I have begged my daughter to look in the basement, where she is positive *it* cannot be, because it is the place she hasn’t looked yet. No use. I will be the only one to locate it. And because they know that I have such a good handle on the most insane minutiae, if I can’t locate something, it’s my fault!!
I am useless in so many ways, one would think that this would be the one really decent use of a photographic memory. And yet I resent it mightily. Then the husband comes home, asks where his *x* is, and I fly into a rage. For reasons he completely cannot grasp.
April 21st, 2008 at 6:09 am
I am often asked to find their stuff. I can direct either of my boys towards an item in plain sight and they still can’t find it till I get up and touch it. Defiantely a boy thing!
Yeah Maddy, how many seconds in 24 hours?
April 21st, 2008 at 8:01 am
Wow, I think you were channeling my husband in one of those snippets! Yeah, no offense to the men but…I think it is a guy thing. At least it is in my house!
April 21st, 2008 at 8:29 am
I thought it was a boy thing…but I guess it can be a daughter thing, too, huh?!
Drives me MAD.
Heidi
April 21st, 2008 at 11:15 am
clones, all intent on driving you batty.
April 21st, 2008 at 2:55 pm
Look for Vivaldi in the cd player…
That is where I find the cds’ I am looking for..
Sometimes..
April 21st, 2008 at 3:54 pm
and I thought “why why why” was tough!
April 21st, 2008 at 6:09 pm
They’re never happy unless I put down whatever it is I am doing and come and point out the object that is RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM. And that includes their dad.
I remember hearing an interview with a woman, a mother, who said they should have sent mothers to Iraq to find the WMD. If a mother couldn’t find them, they don’t exist.
April 21st, 2008 at 6:10 pm
P.S. I hate when they ask how many seconds there are in 24 hours.
April 21st, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Because I always feel compelled to figure it out. I take things way more literally than I have to.
April 21st, 2008 at 6:45 pm
86,400, from She Who Has Calculator.
Excavator, you have to point out their dad before your kids can see him there? Bwahaha. My kids had a dad like that too.