Petite observations
“Mom?”
“Yes dear?”
“How comes you don wear onenna them cool jogging suits like Mrs. Whatsherface?”
“Um……probably because I don’t jog.”
“Mrs. Whatsherface doesn’t jog either, but she always looks so nice. She wore a pink one today wiv little jewels on the butt. You always look so……….”
“Black and white?”
“Old…in a nice cuddly kinda way.”
***
“Mom?”
“Yes dear?”
“I……er…..you……..um……..”
I wait for percolation.
“I am a cute?”
“Definitely.”
“No er…..I am a cute pug puppy?”
“A pug puppy?”
“Yeah. I am dah puppy you are dah bitch.”
“Oh….you are learning a lot at the dog park aren’t you.”
“I am dah cutest one?”
Depends upon your definition of ‘cute.’
***
“MOM!”
“Yes dear?”
“I am be.”
“Oh good. What are you b… I mean……what?”
“I am beed XS. What it is XS?”
“Extra small.” He gasps in shock.
“I am not beed small! Er……I am beed the small……est in dah family, but I am beed huge at school.”
“You certainly are tall for your age.”
“YOU!”
“Yes?”
“Why you are a pet it?”
“I’m not a pet, I’m a ………”
What exactly am I these days, apart from buried?
“No! Yur clothes!”
“My clothes?”
“Yur label.”
“Oh, that’s ‘petite’ it means small in French.”
“Yur cloves are be French?”
“Er…..no they’re from Target, probably from China.”
“Dat is stoopid. Yur cloves are not small dey are whale size.”
Stumble it!
May 14th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
doncha just love ‘em? my little fella says i look like a wrestler in my vest and also insists that i look like elton john!
May 14th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
“Whale Size” I love it. When mine draws a picture of the family, daddy is two times taller than me, but I am wider than the two of them put together.
At least we know in the absence of tact comes honesty!
May 15th, 2008 at 12:03 am
Uh yeah, according to J there must be a baby in my round tummy.
I am SO NOT pregnant! Not even close.
May 15th, 2008 at 3:40 am
they are so good for our egos aren’t they? eesh
May 15th, 2008 at 4:39 am
Ooh, ouch
I love the perspective of your kids BG x
May 15th, 2008 at 4:58 am
A petite whale size at Target?
I’m detecting some real improvements in speech, am I wrong?
May 15th, 2008 at 5:43 am
Thanks for the giggle. I needed it.
May 15th, 2008 at 5:43 am
Once, when he was very small, my son told me he liked my lap because it is “bouncy”. Gee, thanks kid.
I’m sorry, but I did snort just the teeniest bit at his observation.
May 15th, 2008 at 6:07 am
Ah, but what my tots learned at their mum’s knees were what bony knees feel like! (As the cats point out periodically, I’m a wee bit short of lap.)
May 15th, 2008 at 6:08 am
Oh dear - perhaps I should forward a photo to him. I am actually petite whale size; then he’d have some frame of reference. I am tall for my family at 5 feet, and seriously chunky. I had a moment when I was pregnant with the twins: they measured me with a tape measurer around the giant belly and announced “60 inches.” I burst into tears, and they tried to console me - but I was officially as big around as I was tall.
You are, however, absolutely right about keeping anything shiny off your bum. Never a good look.
May 15th, 2008 at 6:25 am
That pic did it for me. Very cute. I recall learning the size game: petite, small, XS.
Interesting.
May 15th, 2008 at 6:58 am
Oh don’t you love that kind of honesty…moments like that I am too stunned to respond.
May 15th, 2008 at 7:24 am
Sometimes you wanna strangle them, but they are so damn cute!
The other day, my boys were setting up my profile on the Wii. When it came to the size, oldest son decided to make it a little bigger because I’m a ‘little’ overweight. Just when I was feeling good about myself! lol
May 15th, 2008 at 11:47 am
You absolutely have the greatest posts of conversations with autistic kids on the Web.
May 15th, 2008 at 12:50 pm
“whale size” has me rollin’!
May 15th, 2008 at 3:28 pm
I needed a little laugh today. Thanks. Love the drawing.
May 15th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
I should send you guys some of my clothes. Then he’s know what “whale size really IS.
May 16th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
What could be construed as insulting observations are, in fact, some of the sweetest things anyone will ever say to you.
May 19th, 2008 at 7:25 am
LMAO - I love these conversations. Have had a few similar myself with my son.