Whoops a daisy
Just like every other parent on the planet, I also have a ‘to do’ list longer than I count but that’s what ‘bullets’ are really for.
I make a start. I take a marker and draw through the first line which reads, ‘wake up.’ I cross off six more lines in a similar fashion. Already I’m am stunningly efficient although still in my dressing gown at dawn.
I whizz through my day in a never ending “circus” of productivity.
The first time it happens I'm caught off guard and grab the kitchen counter for support. I look down at my son who has wrapped himself around my knees for some unaccountable reason. “What are you doing dear?” He grins but scampers away, wordless. If I wasn't half way through chopping an onion I'd be inclined to investigate further.
The second time it happens I see it coming. “What on earth are you doing?” He cackles and flees. By mid-day, they're both at it, one presumably copying the other.
I am under siege.
Inbetween whiles, I make pertinent enquiries, the whys and wherefores of this developmental trend, to no avail.
I am deeply suspicious.
Surely it’s a conspiracy of some vile nature to foil my efficiency quotient for the day.
I notice, quite by chance, that whilst I sit on the carpet with them, I quell any further attacks. As soon as I stand, I am almost immediately struck down.
My ‘to do’ list calls to me from the kitchen, neglected if not ignored.
When their father walks through the door both the boys pounce on me at the same time, “well done guys!” he beams, “but she's supposed to fall down, you've got to try harder.”
My mouth drops open as he grins as me, “aren't they doing well?”
This is not a rhetorical question.
“What do you mean? They've been attacking me like this all day!”
“Not attacking,……. tackling! I taught them last night!”
I think this should have a warning attached = don’t try this at home!
If you have a spare 8 minutes, nip along to the “Autism Acceptance Project” to watch a 10 minute video, because life is two short to read two minutes of credits. Then you can nip along to “Estee’s” blog and tell her that you too can only count to 7, maybe 8 on a good day, or maybe that’s just me?
July 28th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
Time to tackle a certain Other Person Who Has Some Nerve……..
July 29th, 2008 at 3:47 am
*pats Maddy gently*
My husband and kids are very fond of roughhousing, but I seem to have some aversion to being pummeled by little hands most of the time. And here I was thinking that your boys were just engaging in some aggressive snuggling. Now you’re going to have to start learning to fall safely to keep their confidence up.
July 29th, 2008 at 5:11 am
he.is.evil.
July 29th, 2008 at 5:18 am
I see payback for that coming.
I can’t watch the video. I’m 17sec in and over 3min has passed so it’ll take FOREVER to load and play.
My to-do list is more of a wish list for chores. I use to put everything on it, now it’s just the “not everyday stuff”.
S
July 29th, 2008 at 5:24 am
I gave up on the pretense of to-do lists long ago…too depressing to see all that didn’t get done. Maybe I need to write things like “roll on floor with Nik, tickle Nik, fed Nik, change pull-ups (times 5), etc…” Hmmm…I think I rather like that.
And your husband should be horsewhipped for teaching them that!
July 29th, 2008 at 5:31 am
That’s too funny! My little guy does the same trick, but prefers his sister because she is shorter (unless one of us dares to go on the floor).
(comment back from my place)
Orgjunkie.com is “I’m An Organizing Junkie” and she rounds up menu plans from 200+ bloggers every week, she believes in the peace it brings the family. I do it sporatically, thought always like the way it helps our week out when I do. :0)
July 29th, 2008 at 6:34 am
oh man. i’m taking cover.
July 29th, 2008 at 7:02 am
Short answer Maddy -
Ice.
On him.
In bed.
July 29th, 2008 at 8:13 am
Haha, love it!! Did you sic them back on Daddy?
Thanks for visiting my blog. In answer to your question- http://www.cbd.com
July 29th, 2008 at 8:16 am
great post! really and how much you need to grab grace to work the rythym of REST….thanks for stopping by the Lylah Blog and saying hello….blessings on you!
July 29th, 2008 at 8:32 am
Hmmm, I think revenge is in order here, while still recognizing that conspiracy and follow through are great skills. *snicker*
July 29th, 2008 at 9:12 am
HAHAHA!!! That really sounds like something my hubby would do. hehehe
July 29th, 2008 at 10:22 am
Maddy,
I so much enjoy your blog. You have a great flair for writing. I don’t do “to do” lists anymore. If I did they would end up in the bottom of my purse never to be seen again. I get attacked frequently by Brendan, usually in the face with a stuffed animal of some sort. Ack!
July 29th, 2008 at 10:44 am
That sort of thing must be something hubbies learn in Hubby school. It IS a conspiracy – Hubbies and children working together to make sure you never finish your to do list.
July 29th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
They are all boys. They never grow up… they only get bigger.
July 29th, 2008 at 2:14 pm
There’s supposed to be a list? *Gulp*
July 29th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
sounds like your outnumbered! Time to call in some reserves.
July 29th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
I have a list stuck to the side of the fridge with magnetic tape. I cross things off with a dry erase marker, but some days I just don’t even look at it, even though it has some easy ones on it like eat breakfast…
Good luck with the tackling!
July 29th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
How cute!
July 29th, 2008 at 8:13 pm
Oh, I do lists.
Then I run across them again a week later with a pitiful few things crossed off.
Let’s see, as for payback – if it were JoyDad, we could nip the rugby thing in the bud right away with a simple slogan: if I got tackled, he’d get TICKLED…
July 30th, 2008 at 12:37 am
I love your to-do lists. I see that I need to be more specific on mine, then I might feel like I’m accomplishing more.
You might consider teaching the boys about water fights with hoses (if that’s not too daunting for them). That’s always good for retribution.
July 30th, 2008 at 6:56 am
this is one of the funniest things i’ve ever read .. and you obviously have a wonderful husband who loves you to pieces .. well done, dad!
(my husband once taught my then 4 year old daughter to stick her arm out (a la dora the explorer beating back swiper the fox) and say ’shopper no shopping, shopper no shopping’ as soon as i brought an item to the counter at a store. hmm, funny but not quite the same? nope!
thank you for the smiles .. as always
July 30th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
First off, thank you for coming by my blog and leaving a comment. I truly appreciate it.
I’m seeing the writer in you in this post. I love how you kept me captivated by each word to the very end.
The ending is precious. “Not attacking,……. tackling!”
July 30th, 2008 at 7:29 pm
This is one of the best “tackling” stories I’ve read!!
And 75pts to you for making me laugh so hard on my blog wondering why I had a telly in the fireplace. I had to look at my own pictures to figure out what you were talking about!!
July 31st, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Hello dear… you only have to use the TT banner pic if you want to… sometimes I just forget to use mine on my personal blog.