Double Trouble
Double Trouble
Whilst on holiday in England I pursue an exacting beauty routine. At my age I can't be too careful. At all costs I must preserve what withers. These days there is no end of potions and lotions available to the half witted, such as myself. Thus when I dive in the shower with my Brillo pad once in every 24 hour period, I emerge ready to face the world.
I decide, seeing as how it is my Wedding Anniversary, that maybe I should make a little bit more of an effort. I rummage through my luggage for the newly purchased mascara. I left the five year old, dried up predecessor in the bin, in San Jose.
I discover that make-up has advanced since I last had occasion to use any. I recall noting some very fancy spectacles that opened out like doors to aid the visually challenged, but I don't have any to hand. I struggle with wands without magic. I am certain that my nose is a more mountainous obstacle than it used to be or maybe my manipulation skills are less agile.
That said, I yank on a clean T-shirt, good to go.
I bounce out of the bed room to present myself to my husband……….…for his approval……….……which I prompt, “I'm all ready…………in my smart T-shirt……..….which is clean!” He glances in my direction with a child hanging off his elbow, a large child who appears to be suffering an attack of jelly legs.
“Oh yes……very……….er…..white!” I give up and bend down to tie someone's shoe laces, as the shoe lace tying campaign has floundered.
My son examines me, an aerial view, “ooo I am like!”
“Thank you dear.” At least someone appreciates my efforts.
“I am have?”
“Have what dear? A clean T-shirt?”
“No.”
“Er……..what do you want?”
“I am want……er……have……..spiders on my eyes too.”
August 3rd, 2008 at 10:37 pm
Ah, but where are the webs!
August 3rd, 2008 at 10:52 pm
Spider eyes! I love it! My kids freaked out the last time I put makeup on, “Mama, what’s wrong with your face?!”
August 3rd, 2008 at 11:14 pm
Yep. Spiders on our eyes, that’s what we want.
August 4th, 2008 at 12:43 am
Ha! I guess kids keep us humble…?
August 4th, 2008 at 3:30 am
I get so confused with all those different mascaras. I’ve even seen one advertised with a wand that takes away the…um.. spiders..if the legs look like they are a bit cluggy, lol.
August 4th, 2008 at 3:55 am
Anniversary cheers!
Hey, at least he likes the look and wants it for himself…
My acquaintance with make-up is almost as sporadic as yours!
August 4th, 2008 at 4:53 am
That’s wonderful!!
August 4th, 2008 at 5:06 am
I have the spider eyes going on at times, too. I figure at least then you can see I have eyelashes.
August 4th, 2008 at 5:56 am
*giggle*
August 4th, 2008 at 6:17 am
i am forever trying to catch up. it was such a treat to see your video and have a more complete image to go with what i’ve conjured of you. spiders on the eyes, oh my lands…how to kill a mother’s already fragile ego! as for the pets, we have stuck with the same easily replaceable forms as well.
August 4th, 2008 at 6:27 am
Happy Anniversary! Any special plans? Love the ’spider’ eyes. How long did the clean shirt last???
August 4th, 2008 at 7:08 am
Oh, funny! Happy Anniversary!
August 4th, 2008 at 7:14 am
Happy Anniversary! I think your lashes look lovely. Spider away.
August 4th, 2008 at 7:56 am
Make-up? Never even heard of it.
Happy Anniversary!
August 4th, 2008 at 8:46 am
Now THAT’S funny. And a very, very, Happy Anniversary to you, lovely Maddy.
August 4th, 2008 at 9:18 am
LOVE it! Indeed. Make-up. What the heck is that? My six-year old wears more than me. Never out of the house though. Tee hee. Happy Anniversary!
August 4th, 2008 at 10:24 am
LOVE!
once with one of those fancy mascaras, I applied the white primer coat and promptly forgot to add the black top coat…that was fun, especially discovering it 5 hours later.
August 4th, 2008 at 11:25 am
Haha! Happy Anniversary, spider eyes!
August 4th, 2008 at 11:26 am
OMG That is hilarious! Kids are just so honest and cute!
August 4th, 2008 at 11:58 am
Hey, I think they look good!
August 4th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Oh my goodness….I was NOT expecting that! Your spider yes are great!
August 4th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
Kids will say the funniest thing! I gota sked why my lip was bleeding once (I had put on lipstick!)
August 4th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
he he, I think I suffer from the same problem…”spider eyes”, that’s priceless!
August 4th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
You are hysterical! You capture these moments so well that we feel as if we are right there with you!
Beautiful spider eyes! Beautiful boy!
August 4th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
been a long time for me as well with the make-up of any kind. I would have had it smeared. lol
August 4th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
I wouldn’t need mascara at all if I had eyelashes like my son – they are insanely long and curl up just the right amount.
August 4th, 2008 at 4:55 pm
Oh, too funny Maddy! And happy anniversary
Do we get to see his drawing of ‘Mom’s spider eyes’?
Hope you all had a lovely evening out!
~Michelle @ 5MFSN
August 4th, 2008 at 5:15 pm
Oooo, I hate having spiders on my eyes! In fact, I really dread wearing makeup. It requires maintenance during the day, and I don’t have the patience for that.
Tink *~*~*
My Mobile Adventures *~*~*
August 4th, 2008 at 6:42 pm
Ooh – a fancy mascara! I haven’t bought any lately so I don’t recognize that container. I’ll have to show DH – he’s the mascara expert in our house. (He used to design mascara containers and has patents on a couple, so knows far more about the subject than I do!)
I like wearing mascara, but can never be bothered taking it off properly at the end of the day and then I always end up with eye infections
I see you have nice tidy eyebrows too!
August 4th, 2008 at 7:24 pm
cool catch! Hope too see you back at my corner too….
August 4th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
Happpy Anniversary!
A clean shirt at my house is a magnet for muddy little hands. Love the spider eyes :0)
August 4th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
The last time I wore make-up, I got married. So I think it a perfectly appropriate way to celebrate an anniversary!
August 5th, 2008 at 4:33 am
Excellent! Congratulations on making author blog, he picks some gooduns MH
August 5th, 2008 at 4:45 am
Too funny! Children keep you honest! Congratulations on Post Of The Day with authorblog!
August 5th, 2008 at 5:35 am
That’s hilarious!
August 5th, 2008 at 6:23 am
Oh and there was you all done up glamourous! LOL
Congrats on Post of the Day at Authorblog.
August 5th, 2008 at 6:23 am
BWAHAHA! Absolutely delicious!
August 5th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
So much for words out of the mouth of babes!
Congratulations on winning Authorblog’s “Post of the Day” award. I came here thanks to David.
August 5th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Spiders on your eyes! I can totally see where a kid would think that. Too cute!
August 6th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
All I am able to do is laugh, just laugh.